Only Me–Always

by rheeb

I thought I’d take a moment to make a decree.

I am a writer.  I have known this since I was a little girl.  I am a writer.  I know this.  And this is an art form to me.  It transports me to a new realm that has more oxygen than reality.  And I welcome this experience.

Sometimes, I feel empty.

I have a deep yearning to tell stories and make people think…and laugh.

I have these two characters that have been living in my head for years.  I love them.

I’m working on two things currently–a TV Comedy and a drama movie.  I’m doing both through my company Illuminated Puzzle Productions.  I’ve already finished the pilot of the comedy.  The drama is about a young girl who runs away from her life.  I will, down the line, do a third script–or maybe even a mini-series as I sit here thinking about this–about my loved characters.  They’re a butch-femme couple.

I forget who I am so much of the time because of fear and anxiety.  I am still me, every second of the day, and no other person on this planet can make me less of me at any given moment than I will always be.

I am me–always.


And for me, that is the most precious gift and journey–finding out who I am in this time…in this space.  And being free in that.  My life has been like a collection of puzzle pieces.  Sometimes, pieces fit together and illuminate.  This is always freeing.

I feel tears locked up behind my cheeks.  Is that normal?

So yeah, that is what I am doing now–writing scripts.  I’m amazed that it’s taken me so long.  I guess I had to shed some insanity to begin.  Thing is, I absolutely love it.  I love the process.  I love seeing what happens.  It leaves me awestruck.

And I can’t compare myself to anyone else–no matter what.  I am only me.

Only me.


Song of the Day: Remy Shand – Son of Night